Admiral Fowle’s Piscataqua River Tidal Guide
(Not for Navigational Purposes)
Portsmouth, arguably the first town in this country not founded by religious extremists, is bounded on the north and east by the Piscataqua River, the second, third, or fourth fastest-flowing navigable river in the country…read more.
2023—The presses of the Portsmouth Herald go silent after running their final locally-printed edition. 2011—The U.S. and France attack Libya—for its own good, of course. 2003—George W.[MD] Bush starts his…
2004—At Gilley’s, Portsmouth narcs and off-duty cops hold round two of a fight begun at Paddy’s on St. Pat’s Day. 2003—“Why should we hear about body bags and death and…
2017—Arguing Apocalypse Now in the Oval with ’Nam vets, Dolt #45 confuses Agent Orange with napalm. 2008—His high-priced hooker habit exposed, N.Y. Gov. E. Spitzer resigns. 2007—Navy Times: before he…
2008—JPMorgan buys Bear Stearns, with the New York Fed’s $30 billion. 2003—On “Meet the Press,” Dick “Dick” Cheney claims that Saddam Hussein “has, in fact, reconstituted nuclear weapons,” and that“we…
2018—Six die and eight are injured in Miami when a bridge, designed by the same firm as the new Sarah Mildred Long Bridge, collapses. 1999—The “Hockey Stick” graph shows that…
2018—Hoping not to get shot like so many of their late peers, a million American students walk out of school to demand gun control that works. 1977—RIP Fannie Lou Hamer,…
2020—Dolt #45 states the obvious: “I don’t take responsibility at all.” 2019—Gambino family mob boss Frank Cali is whacked in front of his Staten Island home by a QAnon follower…
2014—Austin Ruse, head of the Catholic Family and Human Rights Institute, says on American Family Radio, “the hard left, human-hating people that run modern universities…should all be taken out and…
2020—Dolt #45 announces a travel ban; infected U.S. citizens turn airports all over into super-spreader sites. 2012—Freedom, Maine’s Town Meeting votes to amend the Constitution, nixing corporate “personhood.” 2011—An earthquake…
2020—“Just stay calm,” says Dolt #45. “It [Covid] will go away.” 2004—Pres. George W.[MD] Bush is surprised to learn his Terrorist Surveillance Program expires that day, his lawyers won’t renew…
2007—Presidential candidate Newt Gingrich admits he committed adultery while impeaching Bill Clinton. 1992—Donald Trump files his second bankruptcy in eight months. 1986—Divers locate the crew compartment of the Shuttle Challenger….
1985—A joint U.S./U.K./Saudi operation detonates a 440 lb. car bomb in Beirut; 83 innocent civilians die. The target—also innocent—is unscathed. 1983—Ronald Reagan runs the phrase “evil empire” up the flagpole….
1981—Stabbed at Disneyland, Mel C. Yorba becomes the Magic Kingdom’s first murder victim, because Disney employees feared the consequences if they called an ambulance. 1965—Civil rights marchers en route to…
2011—The Hooksett water treatment plant disgorges two million two-inch plastic discs into the Merrimack after heavy rains. By August they’re at Campobello Island and Rhode Island Sound, in 2014, the…
2007—In Bloomington, Ill., Dee Riddle is startled by a meteorite crashing through her bedroom window. 2003—Dixie Chick Natalie Maines says she’s ashamed that George W.[MD] Bush is a Texan. 2001—A…
2001—Fox broadcasts a “Lone Gunman” show in which U.S. agents remotely hijack an airliner and try to crash it into the World Trade Center. 1987—Ronald Reagan admits trading arms to…
2016—Dolt #45 asserts on live TV that his genitalia are adequate. 1991—LAPD cops savagely beat Rodney King—on tape, it turns out. 1981—Burlington, Vt. elects a new mayor: Socialist Bernie Sanders….
2004—UN weapons inspectors report that Saddam Hussein didn’t have any WMD after all. Oops. 1991—At Ramaila, Iraq, under future-MSNBC military analyst Barry McCaffrey, the U.S. 24th Infantry Division kills about…
1991—“By God,” President George Herbert [Hoover] Walker Bush tells Koch-heads, “we’ve kicked the Vietnam Syndrome once and for all.” 1985—President Reagan insults the Founding Fathers, saying the Contras are their…
2016—Trump’s candidacy “may not be good for America,” admits CBS boss Les Moonves, and the race is a “circus;” but, “it’s damn good for CBS…money’s rolling in, this is fun.”…
2003—A former gay male escort begins attending White House press briefings with his official pass issued under the pseudonym “Jeff Gannon.” 1997—That blue dress gets soiled. 1993—The ATF tries to…
2019—“I fear that if [Trump] loses the election in 2020,” says his ex-lawyer Michael Cohen, “there will never be a peaceful transition of power.” 2014—Senate Republicans block a bill to…
2020—“Within a couple of days, [Covid will be] close to zero. That’s a pretty good job we’ve done.” – #45 2015—Sen. James Inhofe [R–Okla.] conclusively proves that global warming is…
2020—“We will not see diseases like the coronavirus come here,” says Dolt #45’s Kayleigh McEnany. “Isn’t that refreshing when contrasting it with the awful [Obama] presidency…?” 2011—“[A]ny future Defense Secretary…
2001—“My plan reduces the national debt, and fast,” says G.W.[MD] Bush, “…economists worry that we’re going to run out of debt to retire.” 1989—Bad door latch design results in nine…
2016—“I love the poorly educated,” says Dolt #45 to a mob in Nevada. 2016—GOP Senators deny Obama’s Supreme Court nominee a hearing. 2008—Because one maintenance crew fails to warn another…
2018—After jabbing him in the legs and groin for 2.5 hours, Alabama prison officials wheel cancer patient Doyle Hamm out of the death chamber alive. 2004—A Pentagon document leaks: it…
2012—Caught by the Piscataqua’s mighty current during construction of the New Memorial Bridge,the tugboat Miss Stacy nearly sinks. 1975—“Original Dick” Nixon’s top goons, John Mitchell [ex-AG!], Bob Haldeman, and John…