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The New Hampshire Gazette
 Volume 263, No. 6, December 7, 2018

Gazette Front PageDecember 7, 2018 — To download this issue of our paper, just click on the image at right.

George Herbert [Hoover] Walker Bush has died, and the planet’s looking kinda peakèd. There’s a surprisingly strong connection between those two phenomena.

In a sudden and somewhat uncharacteristic fit of decorum, though, we refrain from directly lambasting the former President for his central role in the ruination of this planet’s one and only atmosphere, due to his recent demise.

We do, however, have an alternative target, and, since he’s still consuming oxygen, he’s fair game.

We also take note of the State of New Hampshire’s recent official declaration that, though it operates the Northeast’s largest bootlegging ring, it has—just ask it—pre-emptively defended itself against the petty jealousies of all other liquor enforcement and tax authorities in the region.

The New Hampshire Gazette
 Volume 263, No. 5, November 23, 2018

Gazette Front PageNovember 23, 2018 — To download this issue of our paper, just click on the image at right.

No one, at this point, and least of all us, ever suspected that the alleged Commander-in-Chief would suddenly begin performing the rituals of office in even a marginally-competent manner.

We have to admit, though, we were impressed by the way Donald Trump handled himself recently in Europe, and on his return—in a perverse way, of course.

The California fires provided plenty of nightmare fuel uniquely suited for TV. From time to time, some outlets managed to make the odd reference to our changing climate as a contributing factor. We thought it strange, though that the burned-over nuclear facilities hardly got a mention, so … .

Speaking of California, we were impressed by the L.A. Times’ coverage of Robinson Helicopter Company’s uniquely dangerous R44.

The New Hampshire Gazette
 Volume 263, No. 4, November 9, 2018

Gazette Front PageNovember 9, 2018 — To download this issue of our paper, just click on the image at right.

Finally, the election. A mid-term following the election of, shall we say, a somewhat controversial figure. One would naturally expect its final days to be … entertaining. No, it did not disappoint.

It’s an easy thing to overlook, especially since the corporate media are so easily distracted by other matters which they seem to think are more pressing, but from time to time we like to take stock of where things stand vis a vis the end of the world as we know it.

Amazon’s new series “Homecoming” is watchable and entertaining. It also carries curious echoes of a program out here in the real world.

With 400 members, New Hampshire’s General Court has had its share of … characters. Frank Sapareto is in a class by himself.

The New Hampshire Gazette
 Volume 263, No. 3, October 26, 2018

Gazette Front Page
October 26, 2018 —
To download this issue of our paper, just click on the image at right.

The Republicans face a real challenge in the upcoming mid-term election. Between Trump in the White House and all the miscellaneous shenanigans in Congress, Democrats are itching to vote.

To motivate their team, Fox News, aka the Ministry of Misinformation, has the Fear Dial cranked up to 12. It’s a bold strategy—given the age of the audience, they risk putting more voters in the ICU than the voting booths.

With all the oligarch-funded think tanks the Republicans have on retainer, though, there’s always some new scheme to try out.

The F-35 has finally started earning its keep in Afghanistan. We take a look at its cost-effectiveness.

We also take a look at the Administration’s plans to destroy the Post Office — a topic to which we should all pay more attention.

The New Hampshire Gazette
 Volume 263, No. 2, October 12, 2018

Gazette Front Page
October 12, 2018 —
To download this issue of our paper, just click on the image at right.

” … Some catalyst in the Republican psyche—perhaps it was the rise of Newt Gingrich, a few years later—transmogrified Bork into the Baron of Butthurt: a wronged hero, cruelly denied that which was rightfully his by a brazen gang of unscrupulous schemers. Having conjured up this false assessment of the Democrats’ tactics, Republicans then adopted them as their own Standard Operating Procedure … ”

Also: a recap of the long forgotten and scarcely believable fight over the Crystalline Repository Project, which once threatened to make southwestern New Hampshire a “national sacrifice ares” for the permanent disposal of high-level nuclear waste generated by privately owned nuclear power plants.

Thank goodness such foolishness is over.

What’s that you say …?

The New Hampshire Gazette
 Volume 263, No. 1, September 28, 2018

Gazette Front Page
September 28, 2018 —
To download this issue of our paper, just click on the image at right.

We argue, not without cause, that the political situation in this country has become so jacked up that it’s having an effect on the laws of physics.

In other unexpected news, New Hampshire Democrats hand Hereditary Governor Chris Sununu a made-to-order re-election campaign ad.

Portsmouth locals take a stand against the unrelenting juggernaut of creeping development, insisting instead on the preservation of the beating heart of downtown: its Post Office.

Self-styled Seacoast Deplorables and Occupy Seacoast face off in the Square — guess which group gets busted by the Flag Police.

The New Hampshire Gazette
 Volume 262, No. 26, September 14, 2018

Gazette Front Page
September 14, 2018 —
To download this issue of our paper, just click on the image at right.

Ever since the inauguration, much of the public has clung to the hope that the worst impulses of our worst President would, if necessary, be thwarted by the so-called adults in the room. This past fortnight has rewarded that faith … sort of.

Why are we not reassured?

Yet, perversely optimistic and relentless in our search for silver linings, the Fortnightly Rant eventually stumbles across a few vaguely encouraging factoids.

Among other items in the Alleged News, we attempt to understand GateHouse Media’s math. It ain’t easy.

The New Hampshire Gazette
 Volume 262, No. 25, August 31, 2018

Gazette Front PageAugust 31, 2018 — To download this issue of our paper, just click on the image at right.

“By this point in the script of any classic telenovela, we suspect that (knowing nothing of the genre, really), the protagonist, having endured two double whammies in less than a week, would have secured the sympathies of nearly all the audience. In the grotesque mishegas that is this buffoon’s Presidency, however, the audience remains sharply divided.

“Visions of impending impeachment probably danced in many heads. Imagining such an outcome, though, would require forgetting the fecklessness of the party which would somehow have to carry out that process. As if to demonstrate its unlikeliness, on Tuesday, Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer [D–N.Y.] rolled over and fast-tracked seven more fascist Federalist Society nominees for district court judgeships.”

R.I.P. John McCain

Sunday, August 26, 2018—During the 2004 Presidential campaign, Vermin Love Supreme suspended his own Presidential campaign long enough to pose as a fake reporter in order to grill the late Senator John McCain about the recently fallen Old Man of the Mountain.

McCain’s answer was shocking, but not surprising. Supreme, having secured this explosive footage, took it to the only news medium he knew could trust: The New Hampshire Gazette.

Inexplicably, there have still been no arrests.

The New Hampshire Gazette
 Volume 262, No. 24, August 17, 2018

Gazette Front PageAugust 17, 2018 — To download this issue of our paper, just click on the image at right.

What are the most valuable skills a person can have in these challenging times? Fluency in Chinese? Knowing how to write computer code? Understanding the intricacies of campaign finance law?

In our view it’s the ability to maintain a cheerful demeanor in the face of unrelenting calamity and probable doom. Crying won’t help if you’re stuck in a careening Greyhound with a deranged person at the wheel. Grabbing the wheel might, though.

We raise an eyebrow at the credentials of the un-elected, unconfirmed, unqualified troika of rich old white men who run the Department of Veterans Affairs from a sleazy developer’s tacky Florida club house.

Portsmouth attempts to muffle the combustive, two-wheeled mechano-flatulance of downtown’s most prominent cosplayers—to the usual lack of effect.

Finally, we’re proud to publish “A Foolproof Solution to Gun Violence in the U.S.,” by W.D. Ehrhart, poet, combat-wounded Vietnam veteran, and Master Teacher at the Haverford School in Philadelphia.