We are so old that we remember when the news was more than a litany of catastrophic policy decisions and constant scandals. Can you blame us for feeling a twinge of nostalgia?
On a recent, random, all-too-typical morning, in half an hour, on a now-defunded radio network, we learned that automotive fuel consumption standards were being lowered, a federal health panel had voted to give hepatitis B a second chance to kill babies, and former frontline allies are being deported to face almost certain death.
Is this relentless series of destructive decisions just the inevitable result of handing the federal government over to a cadre of right wing paranoids, grifting billionaires, and amoral apparatchiks? Or are these mugs just working for Putin?
Unfortunately, the circumstantial case for the latter hypothesis seems the stronger of the two. The mysterious Mr. Epstein, his connections with Robert Maxwell, Maxwell’s access to Promis software and the KGB, Trump’s financial shenanigans, the opportunities for blackmail…
Will we ever get definitive proof if Putin is pulling Trump’s strings? Don’t hold your breath. What we do know is that he might as well be. A broken and degraded America makes Russia look stronger. He could hardly do a better job of that if he tried.
Speaking of questions, it has never been a simple matter to decide, how shall we kill people in an ethical manner? The Vatican’s struggle with that issue began more than a thousand years ago. Kings and dictators have traditionally felt less contraint. Democracies, to avoid awkward public relations problems, like to have policies on paper.
As with so many other things—for example, “the weave,” the random utterance of nonsensical sounds, used as a substitute for coherent speech—the current administration seems to be taking a more extemporaneous approach. Still, there is a throughline.
One of the first official acts of our bellicose, self-proclaimed Secretary of War was firing all the Pentagon’s top lawyers and replacing them with shills individuals on whom he can rely. How important was that move? He saw to it before his personal makeup room was installed. Considering that he was hired for his looks, that speaks volumes.
Among the new appointees was Hegseth’s personal lawyer, Timothy Parlatore, who got the rank of Commander and the title of Special Advisor. Parlatore has perhaps been best known for his expertise in defending members of the military who have been accused of war crimes. Pardon our cynicism, but this does not seem coincidental.
It seems a bit strange, considering how many simulated murders the average American watches every day, but the public at large—outside the bounds of the MAGA cult, anyway—still seems to feel ambivalent at best about the real thing.
This general public uneasiness about murder on the high seas seems to have created concern amongst the high and mighty. In place of Hegseth’s normal air of braggadocio, what we’re seeing now is a desperate game of pass the buck.
Who Will Own the Memory Hole?
If it weren’t for the First Amendment, somebody would surely have sued CNN for its role in helping Donald Trump win the presidency in 2016. The network’s “all Trump, all the time” programming attracted enough eyeballs to reap $100 million in extra revenue. In the process, the network gave the man with the golden elevator $2 billion worth of free advertising.
Ever the ungrateful churl, Trump lambastes CNN on a regular basis. Don’t worry, though. The president will get over his dyspepsia towards the network once he has installed his own lackeys in the C suite.
What? How can he do that? Well, apparently it’s easy once you appoint the right people.
Somewhere in the FCC rulebook, there’s probably a line or two that would stand in the way of a president dictating terms to a media network. If there is, Brendan Carr, the Chairman of the FCC, can’t seem to find it. Don’t fault Carr, though. He was too busy writing Project 2025’s chapter on telecommunications and correcting “media bias.”
So, who wants to be the lucky new media mogul? Larry Ellison, who already owns CBS, Paramount, and MTV, has reportedly told the White House he’ll make “major changes” at CNN if his offer succeeds.
Our Award-Winning President
This rant began with a lament over the rate at which things are going to hell. We’ll stick to our guns on that. One recent event even makes us wonder if the pace even may be accelerating. Last Friday FIFA, soccer’s notoriously corrupt governing body, tried to award Donald Trump a hoked-up “Peace Prize.” Like Napoleon crowning himself in 1804—or Vladimir Putin pocketing Robert Kraft’s Super Bowl ring in 2005—Trump grabbed it off the tray and awkwardly draped its ribbon around his own neck.
Miami… Nice
On a more serious and more positive note, Miami, long a Republican stronghold, elected a new mayor on Tuesday. Democrat Eileen Higgins clobbered her Trump-endorsed rival by a ratio of 60-40.