Admiral Fowle’s Piscataqua River Tidal Guide
(Not for Navigational Purposes)
Portsmouth, arguably the first town in this country not founded by religious extremists, is bounded on the north and east by the Piscataqua River, the second, third, or fourth fastest-flowing navigable river in the country…read more.
2019—President Trump makes a phone call to Ukraine President Vladimir Zelenskey. It’s “perfect.” 2000—In a touching display of naiveté, George W.[MD] Bush announces that he has picked Dick “Dick” Cheney…
2017—“Who the hell wants to talk about politics…in front of the Boy Scouts?,” asks Donald Trump, who then talks politics at the Jamboree. 2008—A tornado hits nine towns in N.H.,…
2014—Arizona authorities experimenting with new poisons find Joseph Wood’s execution takes 12 times longer than the expected 10 minutes. 2001—Bank robber Gary Sampson calls the FBI to turn himself in,…
2003—Ratted out by a cousin for a $30 million reward, Uday and Qusay Hussein are shot dead by the 101st. 2001—“I know what I believe,” says G.W.[MD] Bush. “I will…
2007—George W.[MD] Bush invokes the 25th Amendment, making Dick “Dick” Cheney President while Bush gets his colon inspected. 2000—Long-time Texas voter Dick “Dick” Cheney registers in Wyoming to skirt a…
2017—Secretary of State Tillerson states the obvious to other Administration officials: Trump is “a moron.” 2002—The FBI arrests three former NASA interns for stealing a 600 lb. safe holding moon…
2020—“I’ll be right eventually,” says Dolt #45. “I’ll say it again. It’s going to disappear, and I’ll be right.” 2011—As her husband Rupert is being grilled before Parliament about phone-hacking,…
1985—Doped up after cancer surgery five days earlier, Ronald Reagan OKs an arms-for-hostages deal with Iran. 1984—James O. Huberty tells his wife he’s “going to hunt humans,” then kills 21…
2020—Asked if he’ll concede if he loses, #45 says “I’ll have to see.” 2015—Portsmouth cops grill Mike Thiel at his office about a letter in which he complains about helicopters….
1991—The Trump Taj Mahal files for bankruptcy 467 days after opening. 1979—A dam, badly built on shaky ground, collapses in Church Rock, N.M. It spills 1,100 tons of radioactive mill…
1995—A derecho sends hurricane force winds through New York and New England, toppling thousands of trees and killing three people. 1979—President Carter delivers his infamous “malaise” speech, which does not…
2004—The GOP tries to ban gay marriage but can’t rise to the occasion. 2000—Five tobacco companies are ordered to pay $145 billion in damages, but they wiggle off the hook….
1999—Senator Bob Smith [R-N.H.] drops out of the Republican Presidential primary race—and the Party, to boot. Delusional, he’ll run for President as an Independent. 1987—Senator Warren B. Rudman [R-N.H] sets…
1982—FEMA pledges that the mail will get through, even in a nuclear war. 1979—The White Sox are forced to forfeit on Disco Demolition Night: the field was damaged by explosives. …
2003—Condi Rice lies about White House knowledge of Joe Wilson’s Niger investigation; Ari Fleischer outs Valerie Plame as a CIA officer; Karl Rove lies to Time about Wilson’s wife, Plame;…
2007—China executes its Director of the State Food and Drug Administration for taking bribes that resulted in 40 deaths. 2001—A Phoenix FBI agent sends a memo to FBI HQ warning…
2004—“I trust God speaks through me,” George W.[MD] Bush tells a group of Amish people. “Without that, I couldn’t do my job.” 1993—To prove it’s unbreakable, Toronto lawyer Garry Hoy…
2016—Police in Dallas use a bomb-armed robot to kill a man suspected of having murdered five officers. 1976—The State of New York yanks Richard Nixon’s law license. 1969—The U.S. begins…
1986—Reagan’s A.G., Ed Meese, attains quasi-legislative status for Presidential Signing Statements, which previously had had little impact, merely by persuading West Publishing to include them in law books. 1972—Near Danang,…
2013—A runaway fuel train derails and burns, destroying half of downtown Lac Megantic, Quebec. 2001—Ex-FBI Special Agent, devout Catholic, patron of strippers, and exhibitionist Robert Hanssen pleads guilty to selling…
2009—Terry Herbert finds a spectacular hoard of Anglo-Saxon gold ornaments on Fred Johnson’s farm in the West Midlands. It makes both men rich—and bitter enemies. 1968—The US. Congress effectively tramples…
1994—Nye County, Nev., Commissioner Dick Carver re-opens a Federally-closed road with a bulldozer, reigniting the Sagebrush Rebellion. 1975—Eleven years after Goldwater got the GOP nod there, the Ant Farm’s “Media…
1994—The Mayor of Boulder, Colo. declares this “Allen Ginsberg Day.” 1993—In just leather jacket, dog collar, and jockstrap, punk rocker G.G. Allin is laid to rest at St. Rose Cemetery…
2003—George W.[MD] Bush says, “There are some who feel that the conditions are such that they can attack us [in Iraq]. My answer is, bring ’em on.” 1982—Vietnam veteran “Lawn…
2020—“I think we are going to be very good with the coronavirus,” says the oaf in the Oval, “at some point, that’s going to sort of just disappear.” 1981—Irish Cardinal…
2014—The Supreme Court rules in Hobby Lobby that people who are corporations have religious rights, too. 2003—The Army Times reports that the Bush administration wants to cut combat and family-separation…
2016—The 477-foot tanker Chem Venus runs aground off Goat Island, damaging itself and three boats at the Kittery Point Yacht Club. 2006—“It was not always certain,” says President George W.[MD]…
2018—A Trump supporter with a grudge and a shotgun kills five in the Capital Gazette newsroom. 2009—Stephen Hawking throws a party for time travelers. No one shows. 2005—Operation Red Wings…
