To Our Loyal Readers and Subscribers –
Our Response to Covid-19
Publishing the Nation’s Oldest Newspaper™ has been—and continues to be—an all-consuming passion of the Alleged Editor. The many remarkable volunteers who take part in its operation are, if perhaps less clinically rabid than he, also committed to the continuing operating what we also believe to be the nation’s freest paper.
However, shortly after mailing our most recent paper paper—Volume 264, No. 13, on Friday the 13th of March—we had to reassess the practicality of our modus operandi. We could hardly ask our volunteers to venture out into a possibly-hazardous environment and distribute newspapers in places where there would be no one to pick them up. We have a robust taste for the absurd, but that would be too much.
Similarly, our mailing operation generally involves six or eight delightful volunteers—seasoned people, one might say—sitting around a big table in fairly close proximity, talking and laughing as they fold newspapers for mailing. There’s enough criminally insane behavior going on in this country already, much of it emanating from…. You get the point.
Therefore we did what we had to do—for the time being. Here you see the inevitable result of our deliberation: the oldest, freest newspaper in the nation, confined in this sterile digital realm: theoretically infinite yet somehow dimensionless. We will try to make the best of it.
Fortunately, we had already begun work on this website, to create a better reading experience for you. The changes you see now are only the beginning.
