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Will This Be The Week That Was?

Interesting times. Two dozen Abrams Main Battle Tanks rolled onto the streets of the U.S. Capital on Tuesday night. Ominous as that might sound, they were presumably not carrying any live ammunition. The tanks were accompanied by about two dozen Stryker armored fighting vehicles. Combined, this badassery weighs about as much as the U.S. Navy’s Littoral Combat Ship USS Manchester. It was all hauled up from the Fort Formerly Known as Hood, down in Killeen, Texas, for a grand military parade on Saturday. The purpose of the parade is to celebrate the 250th Birthday of the U.S. Army. At least, so sayeth the Army. As it is with war, so it seems with this parade: the first casualty is the truth. The Continental Army was created by the Second Continental Congress, two months and a few days after the Battles of Lexington and Concord. You can read about those battles in our paper of Friday, April 21st. “BLOODY NEWS,” read the headline, over a dispatch…

Better Old News Than New Lies

It has been thought necessary in Chicago to display the American flag in the public schools in the “foreign quarter” of the city—which is about three quarters of it—in order that the pupils may discover what the Stars and Stripes are like. This is in truth an odd country with an odd people. A band of desperados have been trapped near the scene of the recent attempted train robbery near Delhi, Ohio. Peter Alt, proprietor of the Arlington house at Baltimore, Md., was shot dead by his son William, aged fifteen, while beating his wife. Dennis Williams, colored, was lynched at Ellaville, Fla., June 10th, for wounding a white man. One man was killed and three wounded in a recent battle between New Mexican cattlemen…

Page 8

Thurs, June 19

2006—Publisher and Bush appointee Phillip Merrill is discovered shot and weighted down in Chesapeake Bay where the CIA’s Bill Colby and John Paisley ended up; all suicides, though. 1969—Tobar, Nev.—named…

Wed, June 18

2023—Philips Exeter alumnus Stockton Rush and four clients die when Titan is crushed near the Titanic. 2009—Manchester Mayor Frank Guinta steps over a man with a leg broken in a…

Tues, June 17

2020—“[T]he numbers are very minuscule compared to what it was,” says Dolt #45, “[Covid is] dying out.” 2017—Brass on the USS Fitzgerald get their nimble destroyer rammed by a container…

Mon, June 16

2020—The Wall Street Journal publishes Mike Pence’s op-ed, “There Isn’t a Coronavirus Second Wave.” 2019—“Last Call” at The Hammer. 2015—For $50 each, 240 actors cheer on cue in the lobby…

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Volume 269, No. 20

As we were putting this issue together, especially over the last few days, we’ve had our fingers crossed. Now we can breathe a sigh of relief. At least we got this paper mailed, distributed, and posted before the end of the world.

Who knows? Maybe we’ll get lucky and get to do another one. Might as well get started … got to do something while waiting for the Big Elevator Shoe to drop.

Click on this link and the Friday, June 13, 2025 issue of our paper will appear as if by magic.

Apparently it is de rigueur to offer samples in order to entice readers to click on things. Who are we to challenge the wisdom of The Market?

From our “Better Old News Than New Lies” department:

It has been thought necessary in Chicago to display the American flag in the public schools in the “foreign quarter” of the city—which is about three quarters of it—in order that the pupils may discover what the Stars and Stripes are like. This is in truth an odd country with an odd people.

Peter Alt, proprietor of the Arlington house at Baltimore, Md., was shot dead by his son William, aged fifteen, while beating his wife.

The body of banker Garrett, who was drowned by the sinking of his yacht, the Gleam, has been recovered.

The earl of Derby, whose seat is in the suburbs of Liverpool, Eng., is a pronounced kleptomaniac.

Boston’s school committee have voted to drop from the text books used in Boston schools “Swinton’s Outlines of the World’s History,” on account of the allusions which it contains to the subject of “indulgences” by the Roman Catholic church.

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Political Cartoons.

Mike Dater’s Corner

The New Hampshire Gazette’s resident starving artist. Over 20 years of political satire, some whimsical and some occasionally irreverent.

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“Thanks again, as always, for making the now really bad news somewhat easier to tolerate. The truth, which is now seldom spoken, and never spoken by our nation’s “Liar in Chief,” just keeps getting worse and worse. I am thankful for our still (for now, anyway) free press and late night television comedians’ rants posted on Youtube about the state of our country.”

— E.S., Dover, N.H.

Admiral Fowle’s Piscataqua River Tidal Guide
(Not for Navigational Purposes)

Portsmouth, arguably the first town in this country not founded by religious extremists, is bounded on the north and east by the Piscataqua River, the second, third, or fourth fastest-flowing navigable river in the country…read more.