Category: The Alleged News® - The New Hampshire Gazette

No more water, but fire next time…

April 9, 2021April 9, 2021 by The Alleged Editor

Well, maybe water and fire…. Starting this fortnight’s news at the top, we can report that things are looking a little squishy up there at the top of the ancient oblate spheroid we all call home. It’s early in the season, but according one authoritative source,* the extent of arctic sea ice is now lower than it was in 2012, and has been since mid-February. That’s not good, since 2012 holds the record for minimum sea ice. Members of the Party of Lincoln may choose to refute this, but it’s widely believed that ice melts as a result of higher temperatures. Another phenomenon associated with …

Happy National Vietnam War Veterans Day!

March 26, 2021March 26, 2021 by The Alleged Editor

Monday, March 29th will be National Vietnam War Veterans Day, as we all know. “National Vietnam War Veterans Day,” according to Wikipedia,* “is a U.S. holiday observed annually on March 29. It recognizes veterans who served in the U.S. military during the Vietnam War. It should not be confused with Veterans Day.” This particular day was chosen because “on March 29, 1973, Military Assistance Command, Vietnam (MACV) was disbanded and the last U.S. combat troops departed the Republic of Vietnam.” MACV was the successor to MAAG, the Military Assistance Advisory Group, which was sent by Harry Truman, in 1950, to help the French hang onto …

Neoliberalism’s Latest Offering

March 12, 2021 by The Alleged Editor

A recent headline out of South Carolina compels us to drag the term neoliberalism out of the closet; our apologies to the reader. Whenever we use this term we meet with some pushback from certain quarters—and rightly so. It’s one of those abstract, obscure, multi-syllabic terms that is rarely if ever taught in school. It would be downright rude to just throw in on the page and expect everyone to understand what we mean. In those rare cases when it comes up in conversation, an argument is probably underway—or about to begin. These negative characteristics tend to reduce the use—and therefore the usefulness—of the word. …

Well, That Mystery is Finally Solved…

February 26, 2021February 26, 2021 by William Marvel

It’s about damn time. What has it been, now…57 years? “Lee Harvey Oswald was a KGB associate who was personally instructed by Soviet leader Nikita Khrushchev to assassinate President Kennedy. Sometime shortly thereafter, the Soviets changed their minds, and Oswald was told to drop the plan. But Oswald, harboring a blinding love for all things USSR, refused.” At least, so say the authors of Operation Dragon: Inside the Kremlin’s secret war against the United States, according to a write-up about the book in Monday’s New York Post. “Well,” you may well say, “that assertion seems rather bold. What evidence do the authors have have to …

Taking a Longer View of Land Stewardship

February 12, 2021February 12, 2021 by The Alleged Editor

President Biden has nominated Rep. Deb Haaland [D-N.M.] to be Secretary of the Interior. If she’s confirmed, that will be historic; Haaland would be the first Native American to serve in the Cabinet. Haaland is an enrolled citizen of the Pueblo of Laguna, and refers to herself as a 35th-generation New Mexican. The Puebloans, she said in an address to the 2020 DNC convention, migrated to the Rio Grande valley in the late 1200s. Naturally, since Haaland is demonstrably not a white male Republican, there have been some objections. Senator Steve Daines [R-Mont.] released a statement saying, “After our conversation, I’m deeply concerned with the …

Meet the New Era, Much Like the Old Era

January 29, 2021January 29, 2021 by The Alleged Editor

Before everyone forgets, we want to devote just a little space here to memorializing for the record the blessed state of relative calm which has graced this nation in the wake of the “de-platforming”of what had until recently been the nation’s primary source of discordant inanity. Future generations, presuming that any actually come into existence, may have to think for a moment before they understand just what is meant by the above. We who have just lived through it will have no such problem. Someone ought to crank out some t-shirts: “I survived four years of despotism-by-tweet!” No, they probably wouldn’t sell—who would want to …