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2008—Lehman Brothers execs say their firm has all the capital it needs. Five days later it declares bankruptcy. 2001—Donald Rumsfeld admits the Defense Department can’t account for about $2.3 trillion dollars. One day later, no one remembers—or cares. 1980—“Approximately eighty percent of our air pollution stems from hydrocarbons released by vegetation,” says GOP candidate Ronald Reagan. 1977—One-legged Tunisian pimp Hamida Djandoubi becomes the last man to die by a French guillotine. 1969—The AEC fires off a nuke beneath Grand Valley, Colo., to “liberate large quantities of gas.” It works, but no one wants irradiated natural gas. 1945—In Fruita, Colo., Lloyd Wilson chops the head off …

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2008—Lehman Bros., the nation’s fourth largest investment bank, loses 45 percent of its value. 2005—“You know,” says Glenn Beck, “it took me about a year to start hating the 9/11 victims families…When I see a 9/11 victim family on television…I’m just, like ‘Oh, shut up.’ ” 1988—Dan Quayle, who got into law school via an “equal opportunity” program for disadvantaged minorities, says the process was “fair and square.” 1971—Rioting prisoners take nine guards hostage at the Attica Correctional Facility near Buffalo, N.Y. 1949—Canadian Albert Guay becomes the first person to destroy an airliner with a bomb. His recently-insured wife was on board, he was not. …

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2018—Secretary of the Army Mark Esper posts an anti-suicide message on Facebook. It features a photo of Army SSgt. Robert Bales, then doing life for murdering 16 Afghan civilians. 2002—The N.Y. Times publishes lies about tubes based on a White House leak; the White House cites that story as proof Iraq plans to build nukes. 1988—Dan Quayle says, “Republicans understand the importance of bondage between parent and child.” 1978—The Shah uses U.S.-made weapons to crush Tehran riots; 89 die. It’s a pyrrhic victory: six months later the Ayatollah is boss. 1974—Ford pardons Nixon; Lady Liberty gets a knife in the back. 1972—As the Federal Price …

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2003—Warren Zevon sleeps. 1996—Two women walk into the Norfolk (Va.) Naval Base with a banner reading “Love Your Enemies.” They’re promptly arrested. 1988—“Today is Pearl Harbor Day”: WW II vet George H.[H.]W. Bush. 1977—In the Oval Office, Eric Gairy, Grenada’s PM, presents Jimmy Carter with an invitation to visit from the supreme leader of Titania, a moon of Saturn. Zbigniew Brzesinski asks, deadpan, if  Carter, were he to visit, would be expected to give a speech. 1974—R. Nixon, irate that G. Ford is demanding a show of contrition, issues a threat: if Ford doesn’t pardon him, he’ll accuse Ford of promising a pardon in exchange …

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2010—Alabama prison officials ban the reading of a Pulitzer-winning history of Black forced labor. 1978—The U.S.House opens hearings on the assassinations of JFK & MLK. On Dec. 30th they conclude that conspiracies were likely. 1966—The second term of South African Prime Minister Hendrik Verwoerd, the architect of apartheid, is cut short by five stab wounds. 1949—World War II vet and devout churchgoer Howard Unruh kills 13 of his N.J. neighbors in 12 minutes. 1939—Britain’s legendary Spitfire gets its first ‘kill.’ It’s a British Hurricane mistaken for a German plane. 1939—FDR OKs FBI investigation of “subversive activity.” Oops…. 1934—Dan Beacham, Super at the Chiquola Mill in …

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2005—Barbara Bush says Hurricane Katrina was “working very well” for thousands of homeless refugees. 2002—Portsmouth loses Jay Smith, creator of the Press Room, Patron Saint of The Music Hall, &c. RIP. 1991—The D.C. home of Sen. Jesse Helms [R-N.C.] is covered by a giant condom, courtesy of ACT UP. 1990—Los Angeles Police Chief Darryl Gates tell the Senate Judiciary Committee that “casual drug users should be taken out and shot.” 1934—N.C. Gov. John Ehringhaus [Dem.] calls out the National Guard to break a textile strike. Other states follow with pro-plutocracy actions. 1931—Con-Ed worker George Metesky, injured on the job, is denied worker’s comp. “The Mad …

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