Volume 268 | No. 20

2009—A spokesperson explains the conspicuous absence of South Carolina’s GOP Governor: Mark Sanford is “hiking the Appalachian Trail.” 2005—Undeterred by futility, the Republican-led House passes a Flag Protection Amendment.® 2004—On the floor of the Senate, Veep Dick “Dick” Cheney tells Sen. Pat Leahy, “Go fuck yourself.” 2004—Yet another cash-laden C-130 lands in Iraq; this one carries the biggest load of them all: $2,401,600,000. 2002—Enron execs admit they hid $1.5 billion in illegal profits gouged from California ratepayers. 1977—Nixon’s ex-AG John Mitchell begins a 19-month prison sentence. 1972—UPI’s Helen Thomas gets a call from Martha Mitchell: “I’m a captive…”; the phone goes dead. On the scene, …

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2006—Fox News, citing Sen. Rick Santorum (R-Pa.), reports that WMD have been found in Iraq. 2005—Edgar Ray Killen, 80, is found guilty of manslaughter in the case of Schwerner, Goodman, and Chaney. 2004—SpaceShipOne reaches an altitude of 100 kilometers; Mike Melvill becomes the first civilian astronaut. 1989—The U.S. Supreme Court rules that it’s legal to burn the U.S. flag. 1964—Michael Schwerner, Andrew Goodman, and James Chaney are murdered in Mississippi by the KKK. 1942—A Japanese sub shells Fort Stevens, Ore., damaging a phone cable. 1935—The top cop busts a cap at a Eureka, Calif. sawmill; chaos ensues, but a jammed machine gun keeps the death …

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2022—Fox’s Larry Kudlow, referring to Joe Biden, asks ex-Veep Mike Pence if he’s “ever seen a president who refuses to accept blame, and…commits so many falsehoods?” Pence replies, “Never in my lifetime.” 2005—Veep Dick “Dick” Cheney explains to Larry King that the insurgency in Iraq is “in the last throes.” 1953—Lt. Gen. John W. “Iron Mike” O’Daniel arrives in Saigon to confer with French General Henri Navarre on how to bring peace to Vietnam. 1947—Standing up for labor, President Harry S Truman vetoes the anti-union Taft-Hartley Act. 1943—A three-day race riot begins in Detroit; 34 die, 25 of them Black, 17 of whom are killed …

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2006—Publisher and Bush appointee Phillip Merrill is discovered shot and weighted down in Chesapeake Bay where the CIA’s Bill Colby and John Paisley ended up; all suicides, though. 1969—Tobar, Nev.—named for a sign pointing to a saloon—is dealt a death blow by an exploding railroad car full of bombs en route to Vietnam. 1968—“The Green Berets” is released. The New Yorker calls it “unspeakable…stupid…rotten…false in every detail.” 1965—Thousands of funlovers at The Weirs throw rocks at cops and burn overturned cars. The N.H. National Guard peppers them with birdshot as Laconia’s Riot Squad arrests 150. 1954—Warned by Sen. Styles Bridges (R-N.H.) that his son’s homosexuality …

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2023—Philips Exeter alumnus Stockton Rush and four clients die when Titan is crushed near the Titanic. 2009—Manchester Mayor Frank Guinta steps over a man with a leg broken in a brawl to exit the Fish & Game Social Club before EMTs arrive. 1989—RIP I.F. Stone, legendary journalist who said, “Every government is run by liars and nothing they say should be believed.” 1984—Talk show host Alan Berg is machine-gunned to death in his Denver driveway by white supremacists. 1971—Assistant Attorney General William Rehnquist seeks an injunction to keep the Washington Post from publishing the Pentagon Papers. 1965—Operation Arc Light begins: 27 B-52s fly from Guam …

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2020—“[T]he numbers are very minuscule compared to what it was,” says Dolt #45, “[Covid is] dying out.” 2017—Brass on the USS Fitzgerald get their nimble destroyer rammed by a container ship; 7 enlisted sailors die, three are injured, repairs bill: $367M. 2015—Oxymoronic white “supremacist” murders nine in Charleston, S.C. 1972—A Black Vietnam veteran catches Nixon’s Watergate spies. 1971—“I want it implemented on a thievery basis,” President Nixon tells aides. “Goddamn it, get in [to the Brookings Institution] and get those files [that might reveal my treasonous interference with the Paris Peace talks]. Blow the safe and get it.” 1967—Defense Secretary Robert Strange McNamara commissions a …

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